The Feelings Of Falling In Love Essay free essay sample

, Research Paper The Feelings of Falling in Love What is Love? Is it attractive force? Is it familiarity? Is it attachment? Love, in fact, is all of these things combined together. # 8220 ; Love is religious, non physical. It is a brotherhood of psyches and Black Marias and heads, non something you can # 8217 ; t set under your microscope and understand! # 8221 ; Love is an emotion combined with a series of feelings.These feelings can be vastly powerful and wonderful. Romantic love is defined to be an intense emotional province that 1 individual experiences in relation to another. These types of feelings appear to be among the most intense that most of us are capable of, and at least in some instances, grow instead than decrease with clip. Falling in love can be one of the most unaccountable feelings a individual can digest. There are two sets of feelings that are the footing of modern romantic relationships. The first is attractive force. Attraction is the exhilaration you feel when falling in love. To better explicate this feeling, attractive force is what you feel when you have met person new who truly excites you and you begin to experience aroused when believing about this individual. Although this sounds really sexual, this feeling is merely the first of what will most likely go a sexual passion. When in this first province of attractive force, your organic structure feels different # 8211 ; more bouncy, more energetic, and in demand of less nutrient and slumber. When in this province of attractive force, one feels really happy and different every clip that they are with this individual. Frequently the presence ( or sometimes simply thought ) of the loved one can arouse specific physiological reactions. These physiological reactions include: hard-ons for the male, wetness for the female, a ball in the pharynx, sweaty thenars, weak articulatio genuss, cold pess, a pounding bosom. giddiness, and butterflies in the tummy. These physiological reations are wholly normal when falling in love. The 2nd type of experiencing that one endures when falling in love is fond regard. Attachment is a bond or a particular tie between people that are attracted to one another. Attachment helps maintain people together and has more to make with feelings of security than of exhilaration. Romantic love requires attractive force plus fond regard. Person can be really strongly attracted to another individual but neer become affiliated. Without some feeling of fond regard, attractive force is nonspecific. Once you have begun to fall in love with person, this procedure becomes more and more of import and you begin to experience more affiliated to this individual. When in this province of fond regard, each individual would experience as if they are one individual combined together. A particular bond is shared and a sense of comfort and togetherness is felt in most any state of affairs. This fond regard is really normal in close relationships and healthy to a certain extent. Many times one individual becomes more dependent on the other and this can be really unhealthy because everyone needs their ain sense of individuality. Without your ain sense of individuality, you might experience smothered or unable to funcion without your mate. Either manner it is a lose-lose state of affairs. For a healthy relationship, one needs to be able to work without entire dependance on their mate. There are three chief facets of love. Harmonizing to the triangular theory of love, these three constituents include familiarity, passion, and decision/commitment. Intimacy is the feeling of being connected and near to another individual. It is acquiring to cognize the individual beyond the friendship degree and understanding them on a romantic degree. An illustration of this might be traveling to dinner or the films with a prospective mate, instead than the insouciant brushs that person might hold with them in mundane interaction. Familiarity does non merely refer to specific Acts of the Apostless, but besides in verbal and non-verbal looks of love. Although verbal looks of intimate feelings through self-disclosure is of import to relationship quality, the gestural look appears to be more of import. In general people rely more on gestural thanb verval cues to construe messages. Some illustrations of these gestural cues include touch, regard, gestures, and clip spent together. The following facet of love is passion. Passion is the feelings or physical attractive force and sexual consummatio Ns that people have for one another. This is more than adoration of a ace such as Tom Cruise or Demi Moore. It is an attractive force that one might hold for a equal or a individual with whom they are aquainted. Passion acts as the fire that helps the relationship map. The last facet of love is decision/commitment. Decision/commitment refers to the belief that one is in love and committed to a certain romantic relationship. This bond may be every bit informal as a phrase that states they want to day of the month entirely, or it might be every bit formal as a ring of gold that bonds them everlastingly. This committedness is sole between spouses which both need to experience an equal degree of committedness which they need to make up ones mind together. These three facets involve no certain sum of clip. It depends on the individual or individuals and the degree of the relationship. Time will merely give the twosome some room to grow and spread out the feelings felt for one another. Although these feelings are slightly similar with most people who fall in love, there are different types of traits that most people tend to fall in love with. Trusting, caring, wit and friendly relationship may be the best illustrations of characteristics associated with healthy grownup love relationships. To be cared for is one of the most rewarding feelings in one # 8217 ; s life. In my life I know that I have many people that care about me but to be cared about by my fellow is wholly different. This feeling is a sense of completeness. Throughout an persons life they will hold the chance to experience many different relationships affecting these types of feelings for love. Many of these relationships will non be true romantic love. However, hopefully they will larn organize these relationships so they do non reiterate their errors from the yesteryear or Lashkar-e-Taiba others do the same to them. I am now in a relationship where I can state that I am genuinely in love. I know this because of the feelings I get when I am with this particular individual and I am decidedly attached to him. All of these feelings can be really complicated at times but, when you are in the right relationship this emotional roller coaster is really good worth it to experience these powerful feelings of love. # 8220 ; A loving relationship is like an ideal # 8220 ; place # 8221 ; within it you can wholly be yourself, be accepted, understood, trusted, and respected as a valuable being. It is a nurturing enviornment where attempt is made to supply plenty lovingness and security so that one can portion hopes and frights and where 1 is encouraged to larn and grow. # 8221 ; ( Buscaglia, 46. ) Throughout this reappraisal of literature, the feelings of falling in love is explained in a factual affair. The relationship procedure is a complex sum of attempt every bit good as feelings. Most every individual will experience these feelings that I hold described in some point in their life. When they do get down to experience these feelings of falling in love I wish them felicity and fortune. Bibliography Beal, Anne E. and Sternberg, Robert J. Social Construction of Love, Vol 12 No. 3. London, Thousand Oaks, Ca. and New Delhi. August 1995. pg. 423. Journal of Social and Personal Relationships. Buscaglia, Leo. Loving Each Other: The Challenge of Human Relationships. New Jersey 1984. P. 46. Kalbfleish, Pamala J. Interpersonal Communication: Evolving Interpersonal Relationships. New Jersey, Lawrence Erlbaum Associates, Publishers. 1993. pg. 82. Liebowitz, Micheal R. The Chemistry of Love. Canada: Small Brown and Company. 1983. Pg. 89. Morrow, Gregory D. , Clark, Eddie M. and Brock, Karla F. Individual and Partner Love Styles. Vol. 12 No. 3. London, Thousand Oaks, Ca. and New Delhi. August 1995. Pg. 376. Journal of Social and Personal Relationships. Perper, Timothy. Sexual activity Signals: The Biology of Love. ISI Press. Philadelphia 1985. Pgs. 76 and 83. Pope, Kennith. On Love and Loving: Psychological Positions on the Nature and Experience of Romantic Love. Jossey-Bass Publishers. San Francisco, 1980. Pgs 5, 121, 163. THE FEELINGS OF FALLING IN LOVE: A REVIEW OF THE LITERATURE SUBMITTED TO: DR. KAREN SHAFER WRITTEN BY: MELISSA BERNSTEIN Communication 325 NOVEMBER 19, 1996 345